Cigarette: A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool at the other
Divorce:Future tense of marriage
Lecture:An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students
without passing through the minds of either
Conference:The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present
Compromise:The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece
Dictionary:A place where divorce comes before marriage
Conference Room:A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on
Classic:A book which people praise, but do not read
Smile:A curve that can set a lot of things straight
Office:A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life
Experience:The name men give to their mistakes
Atom Bomb:An invention to end all inventions
Philosopher:A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead
Diplomat:A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip
Opportunist:A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river
Optimist:A person who while falling from Eiffel Tower says in midway See I am not injured yet
Pessimist:A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO, Instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY
Miser:A person who lives poor so that he can die rich
Father:A banker provided by nature
Criminal:A guy no different from the rest… except that he got caught
Doctor:A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills
And so, all the night-tide, I lie down by the side
Of my darling- my darling- my life and my bride,
In the sepulchre there by the sea,
In her tomb by the sounding sea.
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